Her Inner Hatred
by cuddlebearlove
Summary: Hermione's thoughts on Trelawney after Harry tells his friends the prophecy. Oneshot set during the summer after OOtP. T for language


Disclaimer: Not mine

Her Inner Hatred

A/N: This is set during the summer after fifth year.

I"ve always hated you, you know.

It started that first day, when you announced that books would not help us succeed in your branch of magic. What sort of teacher doesn't rely on books? It was certainly a turn off, but that in and of itself was not why I hated you.

It was the way you immediately singled out Harry. Everyone does, but there was more to yours. I can understand that if you are going to dramatically guess that a student will die before the end of the year why he would be the one to choose, but it wasn't needed. McGonagall confirmed it was only theatrics on your part, and I was pacified. After all, Harry was in no real trouble. But I still hated you for it.

Sure, Black was on the loose and supposedly out to get Harry, but Harry was safe within the castle. I spared no thought that Harry had faced Voldemort at Hogwarts the previous two years. Perhaps I just didn't want to think about it. He had emerged victorious from both meetings, and was continuing to grow magically every day. So I was sure he would be safe. However, I still hated you.

Even after learning that he had seen a grim, or what appeared to be one at the time, I was sceptical. You don't need books for divination, so how can you ever be sure about anything?

When Harry fell from his broom, I was horrified. But Dumbledore had saved him, and after only a weekend in the hospital wing, he was recovered. So Harry had a close call; it meant nothing. He has close calls every year, and he always bounces back.

Do you remember Christmas dinner? I expect you would, as the headmaster says you rarely join the rest of the staff for any reason. You dramatically announced you couldn't stay because that would make us number thirteen, and the first to rise from the table would die. You better hope that doesn't hold true. Harry and Ron don't know who stood first, but either would be simply unacceptable. It doesn't really matter though, I suppose. Even if it doesn't always ring true, I will still hate you.

I was so angry and tired the day I left divination for the last time. I didn't care that you thought I didn't have the inner eye. I didn't give a damn that you thought I relied on books too much for all the answers. In my eyes, you were a fraud and a waste of my precious time.

There wasn't time to immediately rejoice in my intelligence once we learned that Sirius was the grim. We saw him take Ron and mounted our rescue mission. That night was hectic; not only did we have to save Ron from a nonexistant threat, but also Sirius from a very real one. It wasn't until the next day that I realized I had been correct. Harry's grim had posed no real danger, Voldemort was nowhere to be seen, and you were nothing but an old fraud. A phony, who had no more real insight into future events than a house elf. And while I felt so superior to you in the glory of my realization, I still hated you.

I gave you no more real thought in our fourth year. Harry and Ron treated homework from you as a joke. I admonished them for it, but secretly I was slighly amused. Not only by their humorous attempts at prophesying, but also by the fact that they now accepted you as the joke you were. It assured me that you would not be able to upset Harry over stupid things you "saw" while having tea or gazing into your cloudy, worthless crystal ball.

I wondered why, in our fifth year, Dumbledore was so adament that you stay after Umbridge sacked you. My conclusion was that he simply didn't want to see you thrown out after years of service to the school. That, or he wanted to get one over on Umbridge, just because he could. It didn't really matter to me, though. Because while it is true that I hated Umbridge, I also hated you.

Even after going to the Ministry and seeing the Hall of Prophesy, I still hated you. I was willing to accept that perhaps seers were real, that it was possible to tell of future events given the right circumstances. Not you, though. You were still a fraud.

It is now the summer after fifth year. Harry was returned to Grimmauld Place last week. He is not the boy he once was. He is grieving and Ron and I have largely not pressed him to talk of Sirius, Voldemort, or the abuse he suffered at the hands of Umbridge. I feel he needs to at one point so he can heal, but I will not press him now.

Especially not after tonight. I had thought he seemed overburdened since he has been with us this summer. However, I was able to assume it was all he had gone through. That he would grieve and eventually be relieved of this horrible weight he seems to carry around. Tonight, I found this was not the case. There is another reason he seems so burdened and it is your fault. And I hate you even more for it.

You could argue, I suppose, that it is not your fault. You were just the messager. I don't want to hear your reasonings, though. You made the prophesy. You allowed Dumbledore to hear it. You allowed a Death Eater to overhear part of it. It is all your fault in my eyes.

Had Dumbledore not heard it, I wonder how different things would be. How would not knowing that Harry would have to kill Voldemort or die at his hands have affected his decision making regarding my best friend? Do you know? Can you look into your damn crystal ball and tell me that?

Looking back tonight, I wonder if you knew third year. Was that the reason you predicted Harry would be the one to die? Was it based on your knowledge of what he would eventually be forced to do in order to try and save his own life? Harry says he doesn't think you have knowledge of prophecies you make, due to the trance you are in when it happens. He saw you make a real one, after all.

Speaking of third year, that's something else I can hate you for. You made the prediction, _the prophecy_, that someone would escape and help Voldemort. Well, Pettigrew did, Sirius had to go on the run, and Harry lost the home his godfather readily offered him. It's all your fault, and more reason to hate you.

That means fourth year was your fault as well. If Voldemort didn't have Peter's help, he wouldn't have returned just yet. I realize he was destined to return. After all, who would be happy living in his half dead state. I always understood that eventually, he would be back for real. But he was able to return fourth year because of Pettigrew and your stupid prophecy. Harry had to compete in the tournament, Cedric died, and Voldemort was back and it is all your fault. I hate you, you bitch.

I'm becoming a little irrational. I can see that, but how can I be rational right now? How, after what Harry just told Ron and me. I know it isn't that unexpected. I always had a feeling Harry would be essential to finally sending Voldemort to his grave and Ron didn't seem all that surprised either. It's just that I loathe having to hear it by way of you. I detest that you said it would be that way over sixteen years ago. And I hate you for it all.

I understand now, why you couldn't leave the castle when Umbridge tried to chuck you out. It was for your protection. Dumbledore didn't want you out there if Voldemort knew you were the seer of his fate. Well guess what. I don't really give a damn what happens to you.

Now, books will not help us. They will teach us the defense spells, the charms, the dueling techniques we need to fight him, but ultimately they will not help us. When Harry, Ron and I stand before Voldemort on that fated day, we will be on our own. Because Ron and I will be there. We weren't so taken back by the idea of the prophecy that we would abandon Harry. Like I said, it's not totally unexpected. We will make sure Harry survives and lives long after Voldemort begins to decay and rot. However, I am highly uncomfortable right now. We are dealing with the only one to ever survive the killilng curse, a highly trained, evil wizard, and so many variables and unknowns that no books can give us any clear answers. I hate that, but not as much as I hate you.

You didn't create Voldemort. You didn't give him his ideals and his reasons for wanting to rule our world. You don't even follow him. The intelligent, rational part of me both knows and understands that you didn't sentence Harry to his fate. You very likely don't even remember making the damn prophecy. You have no idea what you have done. That thought should comfort me, but somehow it makes me hate you even more.

Please review:) I know some of you are waiting on other updates from me and the will be out soon. I just had to do this first.


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